Depths of Delta Dawn

So, I am having Thanksgiving at my house this year.
Mom in her psychedelic fog cracked a rare smart-alecky comment about my tendency to go overboard.
Damn it sucks to be so transparent.
Well, I decided I would make bread instead of buying it,
I’d make leafs for my new garage sale steal of a dining room table that when pulled out with it’s new leafs (I am so proud of) it seats 10.
I’ll make new drapes and table cloths with ,
what?
place mats, yes, whoo hoo,
I am on a roll now.
Hmm why buy napkins from the store,
I’ll MAKE THEM!!!!
Ok now mom insist on the traditional turkey, mashed potatoes and stuffing, and said she would do that
(I don't think she can do that seeing bunny's running arround in the liveing room, complements of Lithium, Thorazine, Prozac, Wellbutrin and whatever that other one is)
so I can get down to the gourmet, Crown Roast of Pork with Porcini, Fennel an Apple Stuffing. All this and full time school.
I built the leafs, as told above,
made the drapes,
but damn these placemats are getting a bit much,
not to mention the napkins.
I am giggling like crazy right now because everyone’s placemats and napkins will be a different size and shape if I can’t get my mom off the psycho drugs.
She lifts her head after I butchered the fabric and say’s, “you cut that wrong”,
Gee thanks mom.
I started baking the bread and guess what……
I didn’t know the recipe was for three loafs of bread,
And didn't discover this until after I had 8 batches rising.
so now I have 24 loafs and each guest has to eat at least three.
Oh, my god, I am laughing my ass off.
So the recipe says place loafs on cooking stone
put 1/3 cup water in broiler pan beneath stone
and spritz loafs.
Ok, seems easy,
Loafs on stone,
push in,
pour water in pan,
BAM,
exploding blue glass everywhere.
Guess a glass broiler pan was not the choice of material.
Now only 22 LOAFS

And Another

My Art Experiment

Help the Katrina Victims

In response to your requests, we have collected the following Updates on the local relief effort for Katrina refugees We hope it inspires you to participate in a way that suits your members' ability to help. If YOUR community is organizing assistance, please let us know!The American Red Cross Dallas Area Chapter has set up two shelters: ·
Samuell Grand Recreation Center, 6200 E. Grand Avenue ·
Grauwyler Recreation Center, 7780 Harry Hines Boulevard
The American Red Cross has asked that people NOT bring clothes, food or other items to Reunion Arena where the evacuees are being sheltered.DONATE toiletries, diapers, etc to local centers through St. Luke Community United Methodist Church, 5710 East R.L. Thornton Freeway, 214- 821-2970 Munger Place United Methodist Church, 5200 Bryan Street, Dallas, TX 75206.
CASH DONATIONS remain the best way to help.
Click HERE
to reach the American Red Cross donations page.
OTHER RELIEF ORGANIZATIONS are found
HERE
VOLUNTEER with the American Red Cross by clicking
HERE
OPEN YOUR HOME -
Do you have an extra room, bed or couch where someone could stay?
Click HERE or HERE if you want to open your home. 40,000 beds have been offered so far, but more are needed in the Dallas region.
FOOD DONATIONS are being collected by Christian Community Action.
Click HERE to donate.
DONATIONS of BLOOD through Carter BloodCare will be at the Vista Ridge Mall in Lewisville from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Saturday and from noon to 6 p.m.
Sunday in an effort to help ease the blood shortage in the Gulf Coast area. ASSISTANCE for those already HOUSING a refugee is available from FEMA at (800) 621-3362
INFORMATION for REFUGEES and EVACUEES
SPECIAL HOTEL ROOM RATES throughout Dallas by calling 1-800-792-1029 SHELTER is available by calling the American Red Cross Dallas Area Chapter at 214-678-4200 or 1-800-HELP-NOW or 1-800-257-7575 (Spanish) or visit http://www.redcrossdallas.org/or people seeking social services can call 211.
FREE FOOD STAMPS for two months. Call the Texas Department of Health and Human Services at 1-877-556-2200.
The website is found HERE
FREE GAS is available from the same department.
FILE A CLAIM WITH FEMA at(800) 621-3362 or by clicking HERE MEXICANOS llamen a consulado en Houston al (713) 778-6112 LOCATE A FAMILY at 1-866-GET-INFO Dallas Salvation Army 1-800-253-1868 North Texas Food Bank 214-331-4353 Central Dallas Ministries (Food & Shelter) 214-823-8710

Facts

1. Cherokee is spoken today by about fourteen thousand people in western North Carolina and northeastern Oklahoma.
2. Cherokee became a distinct language about thirty-five hundred years ago.
3. Structurally, Cherokee is a polysynthetic language.
4. Given all possible combinations of affixes, each regular verb can have 21,262 inflected forms.
5. The Cherokee writing system was devised by Sequoyah, the only person in recorded history to accomplish such a task without first being literate in at least one language.
6. Today, the Overhill dialect is maintained by about thirteen thousand people in northeastern Oklahoma. The Middle dialect is now spoken by about seven hundred people on the Qualla Boundary in North Carolina. The Lower dialect is extinct; its last speaker was encountered by the ethnologist James Mooney on the Qualla Boundary in 1888. Another dialect, which shows characteristics of both the Overhill and Middle dialects, is spoken today by about three hundred fifty people in the Snowbird Community near Robbinsville, North Carolina. Cherokee speakers constitute the seventh largest group of speakers of native languages north of Mexico, and in some communities in eastern Oklahoma and western North Carolina, Cherokee is used by speakers of all ages.

http://college.hmco.com/history/readerscomp/naind/html/na_006600_cherokeelang.htm

How!!

Against the common consensus, I am taking Cherokee language courses at college this fall.

I have heard:
1.Why would you take that?
2.Who are you going to talk to?
3.If you take that class, you have to attend at night.
4.Isn’t that a waste of money, you could use that time and money for your degree plan?
5.I don’t understand why you would choose a lost language, You Are SOOO Weird.

Well, I agree with almost all of the reasons why I should take something else, I have asked myself those very questions, especially the night class, but my heart, the heart of a 1\8th Cherokee says Do IT!!
And for all those with #5….
YES
I AM CRAZY
And even
WEIRDER.
If no one thought it would be worth it, they wouldn’t offer Cherokee and Choctaw, and then surely the language would be lost.
I feel I should support it, my gut is that of an adventurer and explorer, so those who know how far off the deep end I can jump, be happy it’s in the seat of a class that makes no sense to you instead of the other side of the world.
With that said

nv-wa-do-hi-ya-dv
(Peace)

Chrerio and up cherokee creek

She new there was a price to pay, and the cost a steep lifetime penance, yet guilt and charity plead its case and the Libran scales they weighed in and a cross balance beam to hell was chosen. Knew she’d be paying and thought it would be sooner, not prepared for it now, damn she could have done it then, her dreams are up for destruction once again, will her survivor mode be enough this time?

New Friend

On my first day of class after many years away from school,
however I struggled to find my way into the arms of my dreams,
I met Pizo.
Worn baggy blue jeans with paint splattered artwork covering with disregard for convention so much of those pants as to be unsure if they really were blue jeans, Hawaiian tourist shirt with the pocket so loaded down with hidden goodies that it seemed the buttons were done askew;
this has been the one of many constants that you can expect from my eccentric artist friend,
he is like that worn blanket that shields you from a world so BIG when you're a tot still clinging for dear life to the comforts of childhood.
His hair remains unkempt, almost hiding the genius twinkle in his rebel soul eyes,
but his fabulous spirit leaves no time to blink before his mouth explodes in quirky and ecclectic conversation.
He is always there in our crowded art department,
gesso'ing huge papers for his brilliant acrylic delights
filling the ears of anyone near with his delightful musings.
A once corporate big wig now gone wild in the field that feeds him and us in return. So, a link to the right will lead you to the world of our Pizo, we love him and will miss him on the days he will share at UTD instead of our Brookhaven retreat. Welcome Pizo!!!

School Day's

I am so in love with college.
I swore if I went back I would focus on courses I wanted to take
Man am I glad I picked art.
I didn't know I was an artist
knew I could write
but writing can bog me down and bring out the blue
and sink me in the dark pits of pain and misery.
Wow art is such an extension of the poet within
and it allows a freedom to be dark without the blue.

Sweet and Sour

My life is like a sweet tart.
Pretty colors
Sugar coated
lemon face
throughout.

Misunderstanding

On my previous post I forgot to add an anonymous signature, since I feel as if I wrote it in its entirety, however that is not the case. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

Dear Alcohol

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my
friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work
cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays,
hidden
inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless
family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your
intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at
heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I
question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity
takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those
ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear
from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I
eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some
stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after
a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I
think
you went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do
more
yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by
causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black
& blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond
me.

Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front
door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous.
I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in
order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable.
My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken
(water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing
out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover
should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to
ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great
stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion
when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In
order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my
grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no
later
than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully
we
can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
One of your many fans

P.S THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening, officer. My, isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear ME sing.

We lay
in timbered sleep
with crinkled
brow

New and Old

The work place doesn't appear inviting me to enter,
so I've have chosen to follow my passions.
School, art, playing,
A monkish solitude
and
(my favorite)
Dreaming.
So all current paths lead to
sandy, white beaches
incredibly blue, ocean water
tropical, warm breezes,
hair tossed with a changing wind
ambiance, inviting creativity,
and darkness allowed as comfort
instead of a smothering blanket.
I still have urges to wander a certain somewhere,
but
the connection of my soul
will have to suffice.

Test

It has come to my attention that my blog is gone.
Is It, gone?

The inner Child

March 15, 2005
Reinventing The Past

Healing Your Inner Child

As we tread our individual pathways in life,

we acquire emotional baggage.

Some of it is easy to recognize but some,

the baggage picked up when we were very young,

is often hidden deep within the subconscious.

The inner child or child within can harbor

decades of old hurt that can cause you to react

to situations and people using childhood pain as a context.

This means that sometimes your reactions

have less to do with the situation at hand,

and more to do with things you experienced long ago

but have not forgotten.

The inner child is an important piece of your emotional makeup.

It can be playful, spontaneous, intuitive, and spiritual,

but can also be fearful, distrustful, and critical.

Painful childhood experiences can negatively affect the adult experience.

Healing the inner child

addresses your child-self's wounds

and frees your adult-self to make decisions based on the present.

There are steps you can take to gently begin healing your inner child.

Working with your inner child is very much like solving a mystery,

and the first step to unlocking that mystery is analyzing your own behavior.

Ask yourself why you are attracted to certain people,

why you react the way you do in particular situations,

and what makes you feel helpless, scared, angry, or lonely.

As you do so,

remember that there is nothing wrong with your feelings

and that there is no shame in being influenced by your inner child.

Ask yourself how those feelings have been influenced by past experiences.

Then mentally revisit your childhood.

Visualize yourself as a child.

Feel what your child-self is feeling.

Finally,

approach him or her

and offer comfort in the form of a hug

infused with positive, loving energy.

In doing so,

you are both healing and letting go of the wounded child's pain.

Attempting to discount the fact

that the inner child has an effect on the adult

denies the impact of old wounds and past experiences.

Acknowledging the inner child honors your past self

and can help you recover painful memories that have been repressed.

But recalling specific memories isn't vital to healing the inner child.

It is enough to be aware

that you can change

the way you unconsciously learned to react in your youth

by nurturing your inner child

and, in doing so, foster a loving and wise present-self.

http://www.dailyom.com/articles/2005/378.html

Shattered

I reside in a GLASS house and sheltered those who love to use slingshots.
When I requested they discontinue using thier weapons,
They got bigger rocks.
Is the house still standing?
Am I laughing my ass off, or...

Birth vvs death of Me

In the darkness
Thick with nourishment
Of my pumping river
They feed
I feed
To make them thrive
Screams excruciating
In what they
Say
Pain
Pleasure
God
And
I
Withered and bountiful
My body
My milky breast
Depleted
Alone
Brain writhes
Pockets red
The only green
Are my crying eyes
The struggles
White Knight
Battles
Fruitless hopes
Damaged dreams
Lead to now
The clarity of my wishes
Shadows
Bleak with despair
No
To parenting
No
To nourishing
No
To giving my soul
To those who do not care.

Right now I feel like a bird
Caged without a key
Everyone comes to stare at me
With so much joy and rivalry
They don't know how I feel inside
Through my smile I cry
They don't know what they're doin' to me
Keeping me from flyin'
That's why I say that
I know why the caged bird sings
Only joy comes from song
She's so rare and beautiful to others
Why not just set her free

So she can Fly, fly, fly

Spreadin her wings and her song

Let herFly, fly fly

For the whole world to see

She's like caged bird
Fly, flyOoh,
just let her fly
Just let her fly
Just let her fly
Spread the wings
Spread the beauty

Caged Bird
(Alicia Keys)

Troubles

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Dear Lord can you take it away? (Oooh)
This pain in my heart that follows me by day
And at night it stalks me like the shadows on my wall (Mmmmm)
Oh, my goodness

Feels like the world is closin' on me
Feels like my dreams will never come to me
I keep on slippin' deeper into myself
And I'm scared, so scared

[chorus:]
If you're troubled, you just gotta let it go
If you're worried baby,
you just gotta let it go
All your hustles aint for nothing,
you just gotta take it slow
When you need me baby,
all you do is let me know
Why does it feel that my mind is constantly trying to pull me down
I can't seem to get away
Continuous mistakes I know I've made before
How long will I feel so out of place

Troubles(Alicia Keys, Kerry Brothers, Jr.)

For Grant I Do

The fighting commences,
Black hearts instead of eyes,
Blue eyes,
Wet
The sweat of our love
Bleeds tears,
Why is everything an end result of your needs?
My soul is dying and you cannot see,
Don’t dare to look,
Wont for a minute
See me.
I say I am depressed,
Do you even remember?
The response,
“Well, all you do is sit on the computer”
Did you see the albums on the shelf?
“No”
Did you see your storage boxes put away?
“No”
Did you eat the food I prepared?
Did you notice the bed I made?
Hands to smooth the tension,
Hands to take you high,
Hands to sooth you down,
Prepare thy soul to care.
But when do I receive?
Any share?
Don’t say you love me,
Show me.
Do you see?
Can you see?
No!
No!
I am alone,
When you say you love me.
I am alone,
When I make love to you,
I am alone.
When I try to cut your hair,
I am alone.
Do you see?
Do you even care?
No!
No!
Lost in a love I fought so hard for,Why?

AGE

"How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face."

-William Yeats