Dear Alcohol

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my
friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work
cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays,
hidden
inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless
family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your
intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at
heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I
question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity
takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those
ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear
from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I
eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some
stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after
a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I
think
you went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do
more
yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by
causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black
& blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond
me.

Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front
door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous.
I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in
order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable.
My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken
(water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing
out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover
should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to
ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great
stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion
when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In
order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my
grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no
later
than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully
we
can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
One of your many fans

P.S THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening, officer. My, isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear ME sing.

We lay
in timbered sleep
with crinkled
brow

New and Old

The work place doesn't appear inviting me to enter,
so I've have chosen to follow my passions.
School, art, playing,
A monkish solitude
and
(my favorite)
Dreaming.
So all current paths lead to
sandy, white beaches
incredibly blue, ocean water
tropical, warm breezes,
hair tossed with a changing wind
ambiance, inviting creativity,
and darkness allowed as comfort
instead of a smothering blanket.
I still have urges to wander a certain somewhere,
but
the connection of my soul
will have to suffice.

Test

It has come to my attention that my blog is gone.
Is It, gone?

The inner Child

March 15, 2005
Reinventing The Past

Healing Your Inner Child

As we tread our individual pathways in life,

we acquire emotional baggage.

Some of it is easy to recognize but some,

the baggage picked up when we were very young,

is often hidden deep within the subconscious.

The inner child or child within can harbor

decades of old hurt that can cause you to react

to situations and people using childhood pain as a context.

This means that sometimes your reactions

have less to do with the situation at hand,

and more to do with things you experienced long ago

but have not forgotten.

The inner child is an important piece of your emotional makeup.

It can be playful, spontaneous, intuitive, and spiritual,

but can also be fearful, distrustful, and critical.

Painful childhood experiences can negatively affect the adult experience.

Healing the inner child

addresses your child-self's wounds

and frees your adult-self to make decisions based on the present.

There are steps you can take to gently begin healing your inner child.

Working with your inner child is very much like solving a mystery,

and the first step to unlocking that mystery is analyzing your own behavior.

Ask yourself why you are attracted to certain people,

why you react the way you do in particular situations,

and what makes you feel helpless, scared, angry, or lonely.

As you do so,

remember that there is nothing wrong with your feelings

and that there is no shame in being influenced by your inner child.

Ask yourself how those feelings have been influenced by past experiences.

Then mentally revisit your childhood.

Visualize yourself as a child.

Feel what your child-self is feeling.

Finally,

approach him or her

and offer comfort in the form of a hug

infused with positive, loving energy.

In doing so,

you are both healing and letting go of the wounded child's pain.

Attempting to discount the fact

that the inner child has an effect on the adult

denies the impact of old wounds and past experiences.

Acknowledging the inner child honors your past self

and can help you recover painful memories that have been repressed.

But recalling specific memories isn't vital to healing the inner child.

It is enough to be aware

that you can change

the way you unconsciously learned to react in your youth

by nurturing your inner child

and, in doing so, foster a loving and wise present-self.

http://www.dailyom.com/articles/2005/378.html

Shattered

I reside in a GLASS house and sheltered those who love to use slingshots.
When I requested they discontinue using thier weapons,
They got bigger rocks.
Is the house still standing?
Am I laughing my ass off, or...

Birth vvs death of Me

In the darkness
Thick with nourishment
Of my pumping river
They feed
I feed
To make them thrive
Screams excruciating
In what they
Say
Pain
Pleasure
God
And
I
Withered and bountiful
My body
My milky breast
Depleted
Alone
Brain writhes
Pockets red
The only green
Are my crying eyes
The struggles
White Knight
Battles
Fruitless hopes
Damaged dreams
Lead to now
The clarity of my wishes
Shadows
Bleak with despair
No
To parenting
No
To nourishing
No
To giving my soul
To those who do not care.

Right now I feel like a bird
Caged without a key
Everyone comes to stare at me
With so much joy and rivalry
They don't know how I feel inside
Through my smile I cry
They don't know what they're doin' to me
Keeping me from flyin'
That's why I say that
I know why the caged bird sings
Only joy comes from song
She's so rare and beautiful to others
Why not just set her free

So she can Fly, fly, fly

Spreadin her wings and her song

Let herFly, fly fly

For the whole world to see

She's like caged bird
Fly, flyOoh,
just let her fly
Just let her fly
Just let her fly
Spread the wings
Spread the beauty

Caged Bird
(Alicia Keys)

Troubles

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Dear Lord can you take it away? (Oooh)
This pain in my heart that follows me by day
And at night it stalks me like the shadows on my wall (Mmmmm)
Oh, my goodness

Feels like the world is closin' on me
Feels like my dreams will never come to me
I keep on slippin' deeper into myself
And I'm scared, so scared

[chorus:]
If you're troubled, you just gotta let it go
If you're worried baby,
you just gotta let it go
All your hustles aint for nothing,
you just gotta take it slow
When you need me baby,
all you do is let me know
Why does it feel that my mind is constantly trying to pull me down
I can't seem to get away
Continuous mistakes I know I've made before
How long will I feel so out of place

Troubles(Alicia Keys, Kerry Brothers, Jr.)

For Grant I Do

The fighting commences,
Black hearts instead of eyes,
Blue eyes,
Wet
The sweat of our love
Bleeds tears,
Why is everything an end result of your needs?
My soul is dying and you cannot see,
Don’t dare to look,
Wont for a minute
See me.
I say I am depressed,
Do you even remember?
The response,
“Well, all you do is sit on the computer”
Did you see the albums on the shelf?
“No”
Did you see your storage boxes put away?
“No”
Did you eat the food I prepared?
Did you notice the bed I made?
Hands to smooth the tension,
Hands to take you high,
Hands to sooth you down,
Prepare thy soul to care.
But when do I receive?
Any share?
Don’t say you love me,
Show me.
Do you see?
Can you see?
No!
No!
I am alone,
When you say you love me.
I am alone,
When I make love to you,
I am alone.
When I try to cut your hair,
I am alone.
Do you see?
Do you even care?
No!
No!
Lost in a love I fought so hard for,Why?

AGE

"How many loved your moments of glad grace,
And loved your beauty with love false or true,
But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you,
And loved the sorrows of your changing face."

-William Yeats

Tunde (cont)

Remember my earlier post on my friendster admirer?
Here is the latest.
Now i am thinking he is
1. Really wanting to cum to America
2. A hopeless romantic
OR
3. A FREAK!!!!

And what exactly is he doing with that pic he printed?
Anyone who has a clue please comment.


hello
well is tund i sent u lettere but u did not feply me
hope is cool well just to tell i printed re pic out 4
daily waching down here
infact is now in my room
and i was last week when i dreampt that we held
hands dacing to soulfull music and when this occur
to me i belive u there 4 me
that is why
so lady bye 4 now till read from u i love out there
tunde

Where Did That Snake GO

Okay, I'm getting a little carried away with my music search, but the end of this video really shocked me.
Talk about foreign inhibitions.
YEA!!! I love it.
Well click on this link and chose the "Radio" video.
Hope you enjoy it as much as I did!!!


Click here for the video

American Rap Disease vs The World

For all those that feel rap is a thug and violence filled music genre, where women and the black society are depicted as drug crazed ho's and pimps, check out this French rappers videos and find hope.
Click here for the video

The artist is MC Solaar

Something, Anything to Replace the Prior Entry

It is really a shame that I have not formulated some type of blog to replace the last entry. As I cringe each time I pull up my blog, which is often since it is set as my home page, I am pushed to replace it with anything. I have searched through my past writing hoping to find a home for it on this page, but alas I am still empty handed.

Meeting This MadWoman

I could just endlessly scream, run raging through the streets with a maniacal grimace of disgust and hopelessness cemented upon my face. The Worker’s Compensation menace is more than I can take. My employer says they have no position to currently accommodate my handicap self and they won’t let me go because that could change. So, I am employed with no income, yet unemployable. The insurance company isn’t liable to pay me anymore, since they have played the game far craftier then I. I can’t get unemployment because I am technically employed and my lawyer won’t call me. I guess I’ll be looking for a shelter next month, better get started now. One twisted blessing is that everyone is jumping ship before it sinks, so I will at least lose the burden of taking others with me. AAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!

To Be-Friend or not, that is the Question

I recently have received some email from my match making Friendster site from several different men. Now I have clearly listed that I am only interested in making connections with the female gender, yet they persist. I decided to respond to Tunde in Nigeria, just to be friendly and broaden a “FRIEND” horizon. Tunde replied, quite sincerely, love only on his horizon. Maybe it’s an immigration thing. I am getting a real kick out of it, so I hope you will too.
This is the exact message, HMMMM, I asked if English was his first language, no response to that.


hello lady
Am very happy 4 the msg u sent o me
well
my name is tunde a graduate in international
relations
and i love travelling from one place to another and i
love having friends out there if u dont mind to be myfriend out there.
little i love many games like basket ball
,footbal ,table tennis e.t.c and i work in a private
stock brokers in my country.but i recieved a little
money to do things but just to make my self happy
well i just want to tell u that am still searching 4
my true love.
I u see lady there many people in this
world
who are not serious with friendship do come to the
cafe room and to make people sad they are not
serious infact some are hallot street urchins but, hi
am very
serious interms of having friends out there and i
need
some who is goin to show me love
more,so i had wanted to go oiut with some out
there in u.s.a bcos i belive as an INTERNATIONAL
GRADUATE I BELIVE i will like to go out with that
is very outspoken and i went throuh ur page i read
everything there i lovely am 37 years old now
so lady i will liuke u send what u have left
if u dont mind us goin into the world of friendship
and as an international relationts guy am even
planning to come there so i could have my masters
in
inter rel
well hope will could meet each order so lady i will
like to tell me liitle about u bye 4 now
and i mind u to listening to ur lovely voice on phone
out there
this my chating id (tundesung) bye 4 now i love u
out there
tunde

Highway out of Hell

Well, I am now embarking on a new path in my Workers Comp nightmare and I anxiously hope the grass will finally stop its endless wilt and die phase and finally lay a fresh cut, golf green turf for me to childishly play. I am officially returning to work. I’d jump for joy if it weren’t such a precarious march toward an undetermined end. I won’t be capable to handle my original position due to the strenuous physical requirements, so I have no idea what lovely surprises my employer will cast my way. Soon, I will be an independent, normal human being again. No spying insurance agents looking to catch me functioning in a manner that is not consistent with my injuries, nor a sick desperation each time my check doesn’t arrive on schedule. The end of hell is near and I am so utterly emotionally exhausted from this nasty relentless game that the sigh I will release may drop me as a faint would an overly clad and tightened corseted woman from the pre 1900’s.

Sweet Treat

Chocolate melting off a perfect wine-red cherry,
Frantic, licking,
My bodies clock ticking,
Passion going harey carey.

Whip cream mingled with my sweet sap
Wet lips savoring,
My bodies flavoring,
Now’s not the time for a catnap.

Pleasure seeking in a sea of scrumptious treats
Long fingers, poking
Hands hot, fire stoking
Sweat, and sweet, O’s melting seats.

Come hither, fruit bowl’s full,
Whip it, beat it,
Brownies, chocolate, eat it
Till ecstasy is anything but dull.

Yawn

I am an eating and sleeping machine. I think I did more of both in the last two days then I’ve done in ages. I must have slept around 18 hours yesterday, ate 3000 calories and tried to watch TV while doing both. Maybe my totem is a bear and the chill in the air sent me prematurely into hibernation.